Approaching the end of the year thoughts

I have been reading all that I can and getting advice from people and truthfully, it has left me down and wondering what will happen this next year. I know that when Heather suggested this blog that it would be to inform people and keep things upbeat. Well, cancer is not always something you can be upbeat about. I want to be honest with the people who read this blog as to what is happening and what goes thru my mind as I progress along day to day. With all the information on the net and such, one can be really upbeat after one article and then down in the dumps the next. That is what the past few days have really been like. My decision to go the course of radiation and interferon has about a 10% statistical chance of keeping the cancer from reoccurring. Weighing that with the possible side effects I still am going that route. Melanoma is a strange cancer. There is really nothing that is proven to remove it from your body except surgically removing it. There are really no proven drugs, natural cures or diet that stop it. Once you have it, you always have it. One fact I did read that I did not know earlier was just how small cancer cells are. One million cancer cells can sit on the head of a pin. A tumor that is one centimeter (less than a half inch in diameter) contains one billion cells. So when the surgeon told us he got it all, he got all that could be seen or suspected. So, because we have a great God, I am going to rely on him to get me thru the treatments and pray that they were not needed as all the cancer had been removed. If he chooses not to have that the case, then I will trust in him that when it is found later, that surgery again can remove it and that he will allow my life to be extended for the 34 years I have promised Patti that I would be around when we celebrated our 34th anniversary on September 24th. Don't mean for this update to be a downer for anyone, including me. Just think of it like the guy on the internet phone commercial who gave his name and number to three hot girls. He was having his phone checked to make sure it was working. He asks the repairman what were the chances that all three called and the same time and jammed his phone. The repairman says one in a million. The guy gets a big smile and say "then I have a chance." Well I have a chance and it is a lot better than a million to one. Thanks for you support and I hope you will continue it in 2008. Steve